Confused....... :(

Well after a long time I felt like updating my blog. Hm...so this means I am feeling a strong emotion that is making me post this write up.
Its been almost 11 months since I had a misunderstanding with once a "good friend". But I have lived with the fact that that relationship would never be what it was earlier. Or is it me who doesn't want that to happen again?
Whatever may be the reason, I am torn between two opposite and contrasting emotions.. indifference and friendship. But the former is intense. But when that person is in front of me, I tend to listen. It stretches to an hour. I just don't get bored. But sometimes...what I call, in my senses, I just hate to speak to that person. Nor in person nor on messengers. I get irritated. I don't have the energy nor the patience to listen. I start having this "don't care" attitude.I am confused as to what I want .Do I want the friendship? Or am I better off without that?
Man...I ate a chocolate with a net weight of 16gm which is rich in fat...I have to burn so much of calories!!!

Change

Well I did not think even in my dreams that one day, I will have to take back my words. Sometime back ,I myself, in this very same blog had posted about changing relations. But never did I think that one day I will have to go through that change myself.

Someone rightly said that change is the only permanent thing on this earth. How very true. But the transition phase sometimes becomes painful. Dr. Spencer in his book "Who moved my cheese? " puts it in a beautiful way:

" The more important your cheese is to you the more you want to hold on to it"

The more we are with a person or in a place or may be a situation, the more complacent we become; the more resistant one becomes to change; more fear builds up towards changes.

Dr.Spencer goes on to say " When you move beyond your fear, you feel free."

This can, in my opinion can only be done by noticing changes at its smallest level and try to quickly adapt to that change.

One will have to change along with the change if not before the change.

I suggest reading this book if you can get hold of one.....

But is it possible to accept a change in the relationship one shares with the other person...it might be in friendship or something else......

Well one of the possible ways could be to try and be more professional.....

But it is easier said than done....

Team Work???

I had a tough time deciding where to post this article..here or in Mixed Bag. Thought I'll do another write up separately for that blog in the days to come.

Working with a group of complete strangers is an experience in itself. Everyone's unique...It gives an exposure to the different personalities exisiting in this vast world. It is a challenge.There will be difference in opinions leading to ego clashes....The challege becomes bigger when one has to work with a person with whom one doesn't share a good relationship...when one shares a bad experience with one of the group members.

It is when the true quality of a team player comes into light. Mixing personal issues with professional life is not the way to work in a group. This is from experience...Have seen people doing it...have done it once myself....I decided to work with entirly a different group while I have experienced the behaviour of the group members in the group.

Lets see the task at hand. While some members work, the others are idle. The reasons are many. The members might not be competitive enough to solve the cases given or there is unwillingness to work. The members get annoyed when the attitude is that of latter...when they are unwilling to work...

When it comes to the organisation, the scene is somewhat same. The people who work, work. But people who don't,also get the credit which puts the morale of the people working sincerely down.

So where do we go from here? Its time to for introspection and see to it that they don't make the lives of people so miserable....

Changing Relations...

It was hard to believe .....The two good friends ended their friendship in a matter of a few minutes....Reason?? Some small and silly reason.Both were lost in their own thoughts.One said something.The other interpreted something else....

Or was it only a reason to move away? Only they can answer...

Another instance...

One wants a change....wants to meet people...don't want to be with the people whom he/she had once considered as friends....the farther one is from one's friend ,the better...the conflicts are less..the friendship remains...(does it??)

But there is a hitch in this. The other 'group members' don't like the change...so what can you do?Give excuses for not being with them....

Friendship is a special feeling one has towards the other where one can speak one's mind without bothering what the other thinks. Its not only about having one's breakfast or lunch or dinner with the other. Its something more than that....

But,yet the differences arise in the best of friends.Hence someone rightly said “True friendship is when two friends can walk in opposite directions, yet remain side by side.”

Change is a part and parcel of life.Change is the only thing which is permanent.One cannot expect a person to remain the same what he/she was a year back. There is growth,change in looking at things in a different light.It not only applies to friendship but also in other relationships.

“We are not the same persons this year as last; nor are those we love. It is a happy chance if we, changing, continue to love a changed person.” Maugham

People make new acquaintances which may or may not turn into a friendship. Those acquaintances might turn out to become a strong friendship...everybody has to be given a chance....

"A new friendship is like an unripened fruit - it may become either an orange or a lemon" - Emma Stacey

Relations change...

Acquaintances become friends....friends become acquaintances....

According to my good old friend, friendship goes through 3 phases or stages.

In the first stage, one tends to see only the virtues.

In the second phase, one would have gotten over the initial high, but now only tend to see the faults of a friend..most of the times, friendships end at this stage.

If the friendship survives the second stage, one sees the friend for exactly what he/she is for and it is the most beautiful phase.One will have great levels of understanding and everything will be fabulous..

"Yesterday brought the beginning, tomorrow brings the end, but somewhere in the middle we became the best of friends.........."

Dreams...a conversation...

With due permission from my good old friend, I have posted the converstion exactly the way it went about....I thought this would add some value to my previous post and answer some of the queries which were posed to me...
Me: I got to writing this about dream because whenever I sleep in the afternoon I wake up very disturbed....I remember bits n pieces of the dream...
its been so for the past 2-3 days....
you get to do things which you would avoid doing in the real world...
for example..having fun with a person whom you would like to avoid...
n the funniest part is that once you get up disturbed and try going back to sleep....it continues from the place where I had got up...
weird..
My good old friend: oh yes.. there is nothing weird about it.
It happens to me all the time too.
But it definitely is a waste of time!
Me: true..
My good old friend: I have refused to get up several times only because I have wanted to see the logical conclusion of a dream, but it's not like a movie you know... it doesn't always have logical conclusions..you have to derive your own conclusions from them...
Me: even I have tried that...
but its not possible...
I've forced myself to continue sleeping and wanted to know..
Me: but here your brain works in 2 ways...
the sub conscious mind n the conscious mind..
My good old friend: yes indeed.
Me: they don't like each other you see..
:D
My good old friend: I agree. That's what nestedminds is all about...
nestedminds=mind within a mind
Me: yeah I've seen that..
My good old friend: It comes from a programming terminology.
Me: But that comes from the behaviour of humans..
My good old friend: A bracket within a bracket is called a nested bracket, a loop within a loop is a nested loop, a condition that is within another is a nested condition... therefore a mind within another is a nested mind!
yes.
Me: with you permission can I post this??
My good old friend: post what?
Me: our conversation...on dream...
My good old friend: Go right ahead. If you feel its blog-worthy!
:)
Me: thanks!!

While You Were Sleeping.....

Dreams.....what to say about dreams? Everyone is very much aware of that. One Dreams about so many thing that it becomes impossible to keep track of them. The funniest part is that one rarely remembers what he/she dreamt about.

One dreams when he/she is into deep sleep. However deep may be the sleep, the sub-conscious mind is very active during these hours. It reflects our deep,hidden , unfulfilled desires. Some times it also reflects our fears which we all know by the name nightmare. nightmares are the one which one remembers in detail... But why?

According to science A dream is the experience of envisioned images, sounds, or other sensations during sleep [ http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dream]

Or is it something more? Extending my previous post, is it something that is trying to warn us of the future?Or is it just another activity of the homan mind??

There are so many questions unanswered...

Sixth Sense?

Remember the time when you are walking alone in an allyway and felt that someone is following you?

Remember the time whe you are writing your examination paper with full concentration and you felt as though someone is peeping into the paper you are writing and lift up your head only to find your professor peeping into your answer paper?

What will you call it? Intution? Fore boding? Hunch ?Foresight into the future?Well does it really exists? I don't know about that.But I have had quite a good number of experiences..

I shall share a few incidents ...

It was in my 8th grade. I imagined myself being punished by my English teacher for not taking my grammar book to the class...was made to stand outside the class.Days passed by...A week also passed. I had almost forgotten about that dream.Then one fine day I was punished...by the same teacher ...for the same reason

For a few days, I was very uncomfortable beign with one of my good friends. I was very apprehensive about our friendship. A few days later we had misunderstandings regarding some trivial matter.

As a matter of fact, if I go back into my memories, I remember writing this article sometime back in the past....